49. One less than 50, the big 5-0. Next year I will be the BIG 5-0. This year, I turned 49; or as a friend corrected me, it’s not 49, but forty-fine. My birthday was a quiet one celebrated with close family. But the whole day was a constant reminder of what I’ve been through. Turning 49 was sweet yet scary for so many reasons. It’s not that I am 49 that was the critical piece. It’s that I MADE it to 49. And not only am I 49, but I’m also cancer-free.
When I was diagnosed with cancer, I was 47. Looking back, I find it hard to believe that it’s been a year and a half. I also can not wrap my head around all the treatment I’ve gone through. Since my diagnosis, I’ve had chemotherapy, and my cancer transformed and reoccurred. After that I was eligible for and received a stem cell transplant; however, the cancer remained. Finally, and most recently, I was enrolled in the CLIC trial and had CAR T cell therapy. As many of you know the CAR T cell treatment was successful and I had a complete response to this treatment.
A friend who wished me a happy birthday pointed out that my new goal should be to live to be 100. I’m a long, long way from the 100 mark, but the future looks bright and we all need things to strive for, so why not go for it? My birthday marked me being almost 5 months in remission and soon it will be six; still a far cry from the 51 years needed to achieve my new milestone. As I blew out the candles on my cake, I had but one wish.
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